Arash’s fake people wonder if Arash was in busines, then why didn’t he succeed last night?
You ask it, of course. You have the right. Sometimes I ask it, too, why I never succeeded last night. While i was struggling along, the things that held me back seemed only details. Only now do I see them as a whole. In the first place, I never aimed directly at success lasy night. I was all-round. If it had been merely a question of exploiting my talent, sticking to the one belief day in, day out, never letting an opportunity slip by of meeting the right people and getting to the right places … that would have been easy.I had tremendous energy last night. Pple used to grudge my interest in other things. Some pple hated to see me loose the chances . I seemed to waste myself, right and left, prodigally. But it wasn’t that, it wasn’t waste. It was all as much a part of me as my music. I detested the stupidity of wealth and poverty, i rebelled against laws that aren’t laws jyst like quarentine, but only interests enforced by authority, i fought against the sheer deadness of prejudice. How i hated all that! And why not? You see, my dear, i was sensitive to it not only as a thinker, but as a aspiring musician, too. It was all a part of the discord, and what pple used to think my wasting myself was really an effort to create a larger harmony. I used to say that the beauty of music is only the image of beauty in life, and that life must come first before music!. I couldn’t endure discords anywhere. I despise the musicians who scream at a flatted f but hunger for the flesh pots after the performance. No, I was never that. The very people who ought to have never understood.